I have this fantasy that someday they’ll be able to put my brain in a jar. That way, when my body dies, they can save my grey matter and put it in some kind of robot or clone body and I’ll be able to live forever. Alternately, I’m okay with them copying all the data on my brain and installing me onto a hard drive so I can live for eternity in a simulation where I’m rich, ripped and can shoot lasers out of my eyes.

The thing that terrifies me about either not-so-likely scenario is the possibility that my consciousness will fall into the wrong hands. I don’t believe in Satan, but I can imagine that being a caged brain in a zoo run by sadists or, even worse, incompetents, could be a lot like Hell. Lately, some videogames have reminded me of this special kind of purgatory and I plan to tell you about them. But first we have to talk about Natalie Wood’s last film and the time I ate too many pot brownies. (more…)