Recently, I finished a book. [Cue gasp]
The book was Dracula. It is about a vampire of the same name and a whole bunch of non-vampire douchebags who decided they needed to kill him after he took a long overseas voyage to London to make new friends (his lonely castle in Transylvania was only inhabited by three annoying whore-vampires that continuously made him fetch babies for them to eat, since they were too lazy to do it themselves). (more…)
Hey America! Are you still watching American Horror Story? Well, of course you are! It’s not the greatest, but it is our national horror story, and you are good countrymen. I’d love to recommend a better serialized drama you could be watching at 10 p.m. on Wednesday nights, but I don’t know of one. So have at it, you patriotic goons. (more…)
MY BALLS! They have descended!
After all of my hooting and hollering about that icky, scary movie, I decided that I needed to stop being a wuss about rewatching it. So, with a huddle of old friends and new, a horde of stuffed animals and a bottle of sake I entered the realm of terror that I’d built up in my mind. You know what? It was not that scary. We didn’t even watch the whole movie, really. I sort of checked out with a hearty “meh” when the closet door was flung open and revealed the monster that had previously haunted my dreams. I was unaffected. I knew, in this moment, that I had become a man, and that watching the rest of the movie was going to be a spectacularly anticlimactic experience. (more…)
It being Halloween, it stands to reason that Lovecraft and his tentacled horrors aren’t far from my mind. I’ve spent quite a bit of time over the weekend trolling about Lovecraftian sites thanks to the 300-link directory assembled by David Haden on Tentaclii. The rest of the blog is pretty swell, too! Stop by and get your eldritch on.
For the last two years, my friend Mike organized an event aptly named The Scare Tour, where we visit various haunted houses and Halloween attractions across three states over the course of several days. Last year, we visited four creeptastic venues and this year we invaded five others (though only one merits inclusion here). Here is an account of three brave men who ventured out in search of the ultimate haunted house! (more…)
If there is any holiday wholeheartedly embraced by Team Unwinnable, it has to be Halloween. Halloween is the only holiday that celebrates fun. You don’t need a date, you don’t have to buy gifts, you don’t have to cook all day and you can wear a costume or just wander about as yourself. Halloween also is the only holiday to celebrate all things spooky and scary – and we love a good fright. So, in honor of our favorite time of the year, we bring you, Dear Reader, our Halloween Mix Tape. (more…)
No matter how many horror movies you’ve seen, there is always one you missed. To celebrate Halloween this year, Team Unwinnable sought out the monster movies they haven’t seen to find out if they are as good as everyone says. In part one, Don Becker took on John Carpenter’s The Thing. For part two, Dave Trainer watched [REC], Olivia Davis saw Prince of Darkness and Erik Weinbrecht gawked at Freaks! Gabba Gabba Hey! In part three, we got undead as Michael Sheridan checked out White Zombie and Chuck Moran played in the Dead Snow. For part four, we called up some demons as Stu Horvath picked Pumpkinhead and Michael Edwards got through a Night of the Demons. For the final part we tackle vampires as Ken Lucas drains Lifeforce, Ian Gonzales buckles some swash with Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter and Tim Mucci meets a bloodsucker of a different sort in Cronos! (more…)
