Unwinnable

Music often inspires emotion but, on some occasions, it can also create narrative. Over a century of film and television has taught us the musical cues that underscore dramatic events – they’re a language unto themselves. It is the tense violin strings that tell us the monster is about to appear or the saccharine saxophone that announces the impending sex scene. In fact, movies with sparse or nonexistent soundtracks often feel wrung of emotion. (more…)

Stu Horvath brings us the sounds of our first imaginary movie: Whiskey & Bullets, a pulpy tale of revenge, murder and booze. Make sure to check out the extended liner notes in this week’s Burnt Offering! (more…)

Thanks, Mom.

There’s a long list of writers, directors, artists and musicians who have influenced me. Recently I wrote about how the science fiction author Douglas Adams helped lead me down the left hand path towards atheism. But I would have never read Adams or countless others if not for one woman. My mother had more to do with me becoming the person I am today than any teacher ever did. And she did it behind the wheel of a faded fire-engine red Ford Fairmont station wagon. (more…)

When it comes to the “Big Four,” I am somewhat embarrassed to admit that Slayer trailed in last place for me. Part of the problem was that they were too fucking scary. Slayer albums were ugly, satanic-looking things that looked like they were cobbled together in blood and flesh by some addled madman. I preferred the austere, somewhat boneheaded symbolism of Metallica’s album covers. Lady Justice is crumbling because the government is all messed up, you know? (more…)

Two months ago, a glowy teaser trailer for Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon dropped and it felt like something I’ve already seen a million times before. (Know that those impressions are coming from someone born two years too late to actually experience the nostalgia being marketed here.)

Pop culture will never forget the ’80s. Cyclical waves of the excessive period come and go every few years, and right now we’re in the midst of a cynical and dark barrage of neo-’80s fluff that’s only going to lead to more stubborn remembering in the future. (more…)

Remember when Elvis’s hip shake was the most scandalous thing about music? Us neither. As soon as music could be recorded and reproduced, it pushed up against the polite boundaries of society. For over 130 years, music has used its unique ability to shock in order to question authority (“Fuck the Police“), religion (“Dear God“) and politics (“Maggie“), but no other subject has had so many taboos shattered by song than sex. So, for Sex Week, we’ve collected the sexiest, dirtiest, perviest songs we could find and mixed them together into two of the naughtiest hours of pounding drums, penetrating guitars and moaning vocals that your ears will ever hear.   (more…)

I am getting ahead of myself. My son, Halford, can barely hold his head up and I’m already plotting his reading habits. These things must be planned, I tell myself. Fantagraphics might let some of those Carl Barks Donald Duck books go out of print. So, I compile a wish list on Amazon of Tin Tin, Astroboy and Asterix – all the fine cartoon art a growing boy needs. (more…)